The Union For Bats' Rights Lyrics

Count: What's wrong, my pets? Why are you angry?
Bat #1: 'Cause ... 'cause we want our rights! We're going on strike! (Loud agreement from other bats.)
Count: On strike? Ah, but what is wrong?
Bat #1: 'Cause ... 'cause we never have any fun! We never get to count!
Bat #2: It's our turn to count!
Other Bats: Yeah, it's our turn to count! It's our turn to count! It's our turn to count! (They keep up the chanting through the next speech.)
Count (to himself): Ah, I have an idea. (Aloud, to bats) Okay, my darlings! You will get to count! (Bats cheer.) You will get to count all the Counts in the room, and then, I, the Count, will count all the bats. (Laughs. Bats groan.) You first, my pets!
Bat #1: Wait a minute! What do you mean, count all the Counts? There's only one of you here!
Count: Precisely so! One wonderful Count! (Laughs, and thunder and lightning flash. Bats groan again.) Now it is my turn to count. (Begins counting the bats, who are all complaing aloud.) One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six! Seven! Seven batty bats! (Laughs, and more thunder and lightning flash.) Ah, fooled them again! (Walks off, leaving bats squeaking angrily.)