Neden Game

Let's meet contestant number 1 He's a schizophrenic, serial killa clown Who says women love his s*xy smile Let's find out if his charm will work on Sharon Sharon, what's your question? Contestant number 1, I believe, first impressions last forever So, let's say you were to come over to my parent's house And have dinner with me and my family Tell me what you'd do to make that first impression really stick Let's see, well, I'd have to think about it I might show up in a tux, ha, but I doubt it I'd probably just show up naked like I always do And look your mama in the eye and tell her, "f**k you" Hurry up, bitch, I'm hungry, I smell spaghetti I kick her in the butt and tell her, "Get the food ready" Your dad would probably start trippin' and get me pissed I'd have to walk up and bust him in his f**kin' lips It's dinnertime, we're hearin' grace from your mother I pull a 40 out and pour some for your little brother I'm steady starin' at your sister, I'll tell ya this Ya know for only 13, she got some big tits After that, your dad would try to jump again And only this time I'd put the 40 to his chin After your mom does the dishes and the silverware I'd dry f**k her till I nut in my underwear Now, let's meet contestant number 2 He's a psychopathic, deranged, crack head freak Who works for the dark carnival He says women call him Stretch Nutz Sharon, lets hear your question I like a man who's not afraid to show his true emotions A man who expresses himself in his own special way Number 2, if you fell in love with me Exactly how would you let me know? First thing, I could never love you You sound like a little witchy bitch, f**k you But if I did, I'd probably show you that I care By takin' all these other mutha f**kas outta here I'd go through your phone book and kill them all And find contestant number 1 and break his f**kin' jaw, what? Anyone who looked at you would have to pay I'd be blowin' f**kin' nuggets off all day I'd tell you that I love you, if you don't say it back I have to chock slam your neck and dislocate your back I sing love songs to you, the best I can And then I club ya in the head like a cave man Then we go to tha beach and walk through the sand I throw a little in your face and say, '€œI'm just playin''€ As you spit it all out, I rub your back And grab your underwear and wedge it up your a*s crack Well, it sounds like contestant number 2 Is just overflowing with sensitivity, Sharon, it's a tough choice so far Sharon, let's have your last question and see Who's gonna have the rights to your Neden Ok, if we were at a dance club And you both noticed me at the same time Tell me, how would you each get my attention And what would your pick up line be Who ever's the smoothest, wins Ok, first, I'd slide up to the bar And tell ya that I can't believe how f**kin' fat you are I'd tell you that I like the way you make your titties shake And if you lost a little weight, you'd look like Ricki Lake f**k that, you'd be jackin' me quick I'd order you a drink and stir it with my d**k And then to get your attention in a crowded place I'd simply walk up and slap you in the f**kin' face Yeah, smack her in the mouth, yo, that'll get her Tell her that she's fat, yeah, that'll work even better Look, f**k you, I got a strong, rap shit You don't want contestant number 2, he's mad whack I walked into a barn and there he was Standin' up on a bucket, uh, tryin' to f**k it It was big, f**kin', smelly a*s, farm llama Damn dawg, how ya gonna diss your mama?