Pain In Da Ass Stewardess

Ladies and Gentleman, we'll be landing in about 20 minutes Descending into Kennedy Airport The time is 5:20 am and we're a little bit early this evening The weather in New York is 55 degrees and there is a light rain falling Thank you so much for flying with us, I hope you had a pleasant flight We'll be coming around and collecting your blankets and headphones So please fasten your seat belt and store your carryon luggage In the seat beneath your a*s Sir, can you please fasten your seat belts we're preparing for landing Aight, I'ma do it right now I just gotta get something out of this bag Sir, can you please put your seat in the upright position And store your tray table away? Alright hold on, I told you I'ma do it right in one minute I just got to get something out of this bag Sir, can you please turn off that Walkman, I've been telling you The entire flight, it's against federal regulations to use a walk Hold on, hold on, hold on, I ain't trying to hear that Listen I told you I was going to do it in one minute You're starting to get on my f**king nerves Get the f**k outta here, aight Sir, is there a problem? Yeah, there's a problem Do I have to alert the captain? Yeah, alert your captain this Get the f**k over here Come here, take me to the f**king captain Who's in charge here? I am I said who's in charge here? Uh, you are Alright then, now turn this mutherf**ker around Is this shit on? Ladies and Gentlemen this is your captain speaking This is a mutherf**king stickup We'll be cruising at an altitude of 30,000 feet I want your wallet, your cash, your jewels Your rings, baby rings, mutherf**king shoes, sneakers, socks I want the credit cards, the welfare cards I even want your f**king freaking flyer mouse I'm telling you the first mutherf**ker to move Is gonna catch this mutherf**ker Now send the bag around, thank you Mutherf**ker didn't I say don't move