Three Balloons

I call you from my car to say I'll be there in awhile A short plan ride and I will get to see your pretty smile. There's nothing on the radio; I'd fiddled the dial Then I see a sign: the airport is just another mile I check my bags and think about how much I hate to fly, And as I near security I almost start to cry. Well I hope the law enforcement agent's can't tell from my face, I got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place. I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air, 'Cuz with four balloons of heroin, it's getting crowded up in there. Crowded up in there. My mind is all a-jumble and my blood is cold as ice. I dread the thought of having to unload this merchandise. Relax, I say, it's not so bad; it might be kinda nice, Besides who hasn't had a finger up there once or twice. I must remember don't leave any drugs inside the host; I did that once and a girl who tossed my salad overdosed. Well I hope the law enforcement agent's can't tell from my face, I've got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place. I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air, 'Cuz with four balloons of heroin, it's getting crowded up in there. Ooh, In my derriere. I was a little eager when I loaded up my stash Five balloons of ecstacy, six balloons of hash, Eight balloons of LSD, nine of s*xy mild, A box of Chinese fireworks, a Guatemalan child. I made it to the gate and now my joy I can't contain. I board the aircraft, take my seat in the cockpit of the plane- As I taxi down the runway I get a smile on my face, And I've got three baloons of coke in an uncomfortable place. Flight crew, prepare for takeoff, as I lift us the air, Cuz with four balloons of heroin, it's getting crowded up in there. Oh, up in my derriere. Three balloons... Three balloons... Three balloons...