Two Pints

Hey mister bartender give me a drink I wanna cold wet gla*s with bubbles in it And that doesn't mean I can't handle anything stronger now Just think I'll wait a while. I'll have a pint of lager please And a pack of flakies Give me a pint of lager please And a can of baked beans So hey misses tongue driver give us a squeeze But put your coat back down cos I aint ready to leave This doesn't mean I don't wanna take you back You'll just have to wait for that I'll have a pint of lager please A complimentary striptease Give me a pint of lager please And a bag of green peas Take me to the kebab hut! So fill me up with flakes of manky mutton High up to the top And don't be putting veg on that Don't want no cabbage patch kebab A dab of ketchup, make it red And please make sure the sheep is dead And throw some peppers in the bag "Would you like chili sauce on that?" Mmmmm! And a pint of lager please With a pack of flakies Give me a pint of lager please Some soft scoop ice cream So hey mister cab driver Give me some breeze It's been a long long night and it's repeating on me And that doesn't mean it's time.... to..... You know what I mean? Just open the window Geez Urrrrrgh! I'll have a pint of lager please Don't give a monkey's Give me a pint of lager please And some processed cheese