Life Of The Party

Well they call me the life of the party They call her the belle of the ball Well we start before anybody And I promise we'll outlast them all Well it started when I was in high school My mom and my dad taught me well A bottle of wine at Thanksgivin' And a Valium when grandma raised hell So I had some champagne at a wedding I believe that they called it 'Cold Duck' And they girl I'd been eying all evenin' She took me round back and we s*cked down the rest of that bottle And things really started to click Well we kissed on the boxes of liquor And she reached down and grabbed her some d**kle And added some cola Far be it for me should I pa*s For I thought that if I drank another I'd certainly need me some Aspirin On the next mornin' I'd tried not to make me a sound 'Cause the girl who was sleepin' beside me Had gained herself two hundred Pounding on my bedroom window My dad yelled to jump out of bed But she woke up from all the commotion Insisting she give me some headlines She'd read in the paper She said it had been yesterday They said if you use moderation Our mornings could all be this way Well they call me the life of the party They call her the belle of the ball Well we start before anybody And I promise we'll outlast them all