All I Wanna Do Is Play Cards

well, i guess i really oughta be makin up songs but i know it's dumb and sick and wrong and got the studio booked in tennessee and my record producer's callin me the tape will roll in just three weeks and they wanna book the band for a rodeo dance and the contract claims they got five grand and my agent says we oughta take the show but tell you the truth i don't wanna go cuz there's this real good game of split hi-lo and tattooed young dark haired girls call me and i could skate for free in the hockey league and there's famous people’d like to write with me and the beer at the black dog’s usually free the whole damn world’s an oyster to me and we're on the radio in el paso and finally got a little bit of press in t.o. and they're buying the records out in amsterdam there's rock tours booked in far off lands but i'm feelin kinda gambley and i don’t see much of my friends these days cuz except whitey and gravy, they like a game and my neighbor brent says i got a problem but he don't know cuz nobody taught him to bet the best when you know you got ‘em and all i wanna do is play cards crib and guts and stook and gin and stud and cowboy pitch blackjack, eight or better, draw and hold em, chase the bitch acey deucy, never loosey, hearts and black mariah smear and low chicago, man, the stakes keep gettin higher contract bridge and spades and whist and kings and little ones canasta, hearts and spite and malice, kings make little ones whores and fours and one-eyed bores, house rules that ain't acknowledged and them games you learned at vet school and at agricultural college chinese rummy, greek manila, omaha, dutch chase start em when they're young with fish and war and crazy eights twenty one and thirty one and seven twenty seven well if i don't play for money, hon, will i still get to heaven three card brag and three card monte, razz and deuce to seven melding sets and red dog bets and counting cards with kevin between the sheets and screw your neighor, let it ride, strip poker old men on the corner playing pinochle and euchre yeah