Disconnected

These things which I so often wonder This need to create myself Frustration forgotten through slumber It's there when I wake Defeated before I rise I'd pull myself out of his mire If I could collect my strength Or muster an ounce of desire Finding the words and making them mine Is there somewhere I could seperate this feeling from memory Disconnect myself from me Desire inside to mistreat you It pushes words out of my mouth This cyclical pattern I feed you The back and forth and up and down But still here you are Behind this veil of pious revelation I'll close my eyes and look for worth inside I don't deserve you Relinquishing hope for the future I try not to hate it so But you are a bridge to those memories I try to forget if you only knew Is there somewhere to occupy emotion A room to keep my rage away from you Just tell me when these hopeless days are over I'll open my eyes and see my new sun rise I don't deserve this