I'm The Guy

I'm the guy who lurks In the heart of every man I'm the creepy jerk Dressed up like your dearest friend I am Jonah's whale flying friendly sail I'm the mind you're living in I, I, I, I, I'm the guy I'm the guy who thinks Of the press and interviews Like to walk a mile In God's favorite running shoes If you specify who has made you cry Who can give the suicidal blues I, I, I, I, I'm the guy I'm the one you can't get free I will always be like a wolf that's at your door What your women wants is me I'm the one she's waited for She's waited for I'm the one eyed jack I'm the one you can't ignore Just give me somethin' better than that I'm the guy who wants more and more And more and more and more And then when I'm through You'll be turned into An emotional vegetable 'Cause I, I, I, I, I'm the guy I'll tell you how great you are You're the best by far You're a drop dead centerfold That girl ain't nothin', you're the star And your life will be controlled It'll be controlled by me