The Man In The Santa Suit

At the KOC local 313 There's a fat man standing by the soda machine And he knows, he knows, he knows Life can be funny He calls the hair salon says, "Put Loretta on 'Cause the mall just called and said the last guy's gone And I know, I know, God knows We need the money" He's a big red cherry But it's hard to be merry When the kids are all laughing Saying, "Hey, it's Jerry Garcia Ain't he cute? The man in the Santa suit" And all the moms in town bring their brats around And they can't sit still or keep their root beer down Now it's up, hey how 'bout that It looks like a milkshake Now Jimmy's grown this year says, "Mommy quick come here Santa's sweaty and he smells like beer" And he says, "Kid, shut your mouth You give me a headache" And he's jolly and hairy But it's hard to be merry When the guys at the bar Say he looks like a fairy But he's doing it just for the loot The man in the Santa suit And he's a big red cherry He's jolly and hairy Everyone's laughing But he doesn't care, he stays cool Ain't he cute? The man in the Santa suit