You Are What You Is

Frank zappa (guitar, synclavier) Steve vai (guitar) Ray white (guitar, vocals) Tommy mars (keyboards) Chuck wild (piano) Arthur barrow (ba*s) Scott thunes (ba*s) Jay anderson (string ba*s) Ed mann (percussion) Chad wackerman (drums) Ike willis (vocals) Terry bozzio (vocals) Dale bozzio (vocals) Napoleon murphy brock (vocals) Bob harris (vocals) Johnny "guitar" watson (vocals) Ensemble: (displaying dummy #1) Do you know what you are? Thing-fish: Dat what I ast ya! Ensemble: You are what you is you is what you am Thing-fish: And dat de trufe! Ensemble: (a cow don't make ham...) Thing-fish: I meant dat now! Ensemble: You ain't what you're not Thing-fish: Not even hardly... Ensemble: So see what you got Thing-fish: And you got a lot o' lookin' t'do, junior! Ensemble: You are what you is Thing-fish: Dat entirely too correct! Ensemble: An' that's all it 'tis! Thing-fish: Uh-huhhhh! Ensemble: A foolish young man Thing-fish: Bring dat dummy ovuh heah 'n show it to 'em! Ensemble: Stashed away in san quentim ate de mys'try potatoes Thing-fish: Told ya 'bout dem 'taters! Ensemble: Evil prince was inventin' now he talk like de thing-fish Thing-fish: (manipulating the dummy) ("hmmmm, saffiiiee!") Ensemble: An' he look like a mammy! Thing-fish: (manipulating the dummy) ("see de mammy, now! see de mammy, now!") Ensemble: His fav'rit co-log-numm... Thing-fish: Smell like... Sister potato head bobby brown, sister ghenghis adonis osmosis, sister jasmine noxema tapioca: Chitlins! Ensemble: Is de one dey call 'sammy'! Thing-fish: One-adam-twelve...see de mammy... Ensemble: He finally layin' Thing-fish: Armed 'n dangerous, reproach wit cautium! Ensemble: De whole thang down, 'cept de nivea lotium! Thing-fish: Rub it on good, now! Ensemble: An de royal crown! Thing-fish: Take good care o' dat "ash"! Ensemble: Do you know what you are? Thing-fish: You's a wimp...she's a shrew! Ensemble: You are what you is Thing-fish: Got dat? Ensemble: You is what you am Thing-fish: One-adam-twelve, see de mammy agin'! Ensemble: (a cow don't make ham...) Thing-fish: And it never will... Ensemble: You ain't what you're not, Thing-fish: Unless science do somethin' 'bout it! Ensemble: So see what you got! Thing-fish: I know dey woikin' on it... Ensemble: You are what you is, Thing-fish: Underneath virginia! Ensemble: An' that's all it 'tis! Thing-fish: Boog-boogmmm, dano..."mammy one"! they toss dummy #1 into the wings, an d introduce dummy #2 to harry & rhonda. their torture-chairs, (on a rolling platform), are wheeled to center E. the action takes place all around them. Ensemble: (showing dummy #2) A foolish young man Of de negro persuasion Devoted his life To become a caucasian He stopped eating pork He stopped eating greens He trade his dashiki Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: (manipulating the dummy) ("uhuru!") Ensemble: For some jordache jeans! He learned to play golf An' he got a good score Now he says to himself: "i ain't no..." Thing-fish: "nignint!" Ensemble: No more...hey! hey! hey!" Thing-fish: One-adam-twelve, see de "nignint" wit knife... proceed wif cautium...knife may be open... Ensemble: Bwana ma-coo-bah Harry: All right! let's go! Ensemble: Mercedes bainnnzzzzz! Ensemble: Who is who? Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: (singing) I don't know... Ensemble: 'n what is what Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Somethin' I just don't know... Ensemble: 'n why is this Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Tell me now... Ensemble: Appropriot Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: That's a funny pronunciation, if'n ever I heard one! Ensemble: If you don't like Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Where'd you get that word? Ensemble: What you has got Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Appropriot? the word is not! Ensemble: Drop it in the dirt Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Drop it, yeah! Ensemble: 'n let it rot Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I can smell it now! Ensemble: Someone else Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Here de come, here de come! Ensemble: Will surely come Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I told you he was comin'! Ensemble: 'n pick it up Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: That's right! Ensemble: 'cause he wants some Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: An' he wants it for free! Ensemble: And when one day Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: There will come a day! Ensemble: You wonder who Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I wonder too! Ensemble: You used to was Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Who I was, anyway! Ensemble: 'n what you do Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I used to work at the post office! Ensemble: You'll scratch your head Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: But I don't wanna un-do my doo! Ensemble: 'n look around Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: To see what's goin' on! Ensemble: But what you lost Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Can't seem to find it! Ensemble: Will not be found Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: A mercedes benz! Ensemble: Do you know what you are? Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I know! Ensemble: You are what you is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I'm the kinda guy... Ensemble: You is what you am Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: That ought to be drivin' Ensemble: A cow don't make ham Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: A four-fifty slc... Ensemble: You ain't what you're not Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: A big ol' red one! Ensemble: So see what you got Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: With some golf clubs stickin' out de trunk! Ensemble: You are what you is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I'm gwine down to de links on saturday mornin'! Ensemble: An' that's all it is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Gimme a five dollar bill! Ensemble: You are what you is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: And an overcoat too... Ensemble: An' that's all it is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Where's my waitress, yeahhhh! Ensemble: You are what you is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: Robbie, take me to greek town! Ensemble: An' that's all it is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I'm harder than yer husband; harder than yer husband! Ensemble: You are what you is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I'm goin' down to white street, to the mudd club, y'all! Ensemble: An' that's all it is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: I'm goin' down 'n work the wall! 'n work the floor Ensemble: You are what you is Sister owl-gonkwin-jane cow-hoon: 'n work the pipe, 'n work the wall some more! Ensemble: An' that's all it is