Mississippi Squirrel Revival

Well when I was a kid I would take a trip every Summer down to "Mississipp," to visit my Granny and her "Auntie Bellam World." I'd run barefooted all-day long, climbing trees free as a song; One day I happened to catch myself a squirrel. Well I stuffed him down in an old shoe box, and punched a couple holes in the top; When Sunday came I snuck em' in to Church. I sittin' way back on the very last pew showin em' to my good buddy Hugh, when that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk. Well what happened next is hard to tell; some thought it was Heaven others thought it was Hell, but the fact that something was among was plain to see. As the choir sang " I Surrender All", the squirrel ran up Harv Newman's coveralls, Harv leaped to his feet and said something's got a hold on me Yeow! CHORUS The day the squirrel went berserk in the First Self-Righteous Church in that sleepy little town of Pascagoula. It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival. They were jumpin' pews and shoutin' "Hallelujah". VERSE 2 Well Harv hit the aisles dancin' and screamin'. Some thought he had Religion, others thought he had a demon, And Harv thought he had a weed-eater loose in his fruit-of-the-looms. He fell to his knees to plead and beg, and the squirrel ran out of his britches-leg; unobserved to the other side of the room. All the way down to the "AMEN Pew", where sat "Sister Bertha Better-than-You", who had been watching all of the commotion with sadistic glee. But shoot, you should have seen the look in her eyes when that squirrel jumped her garders and crossed her thighs. And she jumped tio her feet and said "Lord have mercy on me!" As the squirrell made laps inside of her dress, she began to cry and then to confess, to sins that would make a sailor blush with shame. She told of gossip and Church dissention, but the thing that got the most attention was when she talked about her love life, and then she started naming names! CHORUS Well seven deacons and the Pastor got saved. and $25.000 got raised, and 50 volunteered for missions in the Congo on the spot! And even without an invitation there were 500 re-dedications and we all got re-Baptised whether we needed it or not. Now you've heard the Bible story I guess how He parted the waters for Moses to pa*s. Oh the miracles God has wrought in this old world! But the one I'll remember til my dying day was how He put that Church back on the narrow way with a half-crazed Mississippi squirrel CHORUS