What The Hell Happened To Me

I used to ride a big wheel. And sell lemonade. Eat popcorn with Grandpa while we watched a parade. But now I'm only happy when I'm drinkin' J.D. What the hell happened to me? I used to have fun throwing snowballs. With my best friend Billy. Then Mom would make us cocoa if we got too chilly. But now I only get excited when I see a girl pee. What the hell happened to me? I used to be the nicest kid in the neighborhood. I only did the things that Mama said I should. But now I just do whatever I want. I even whipped it out in a restaurant. I used to help clean the park in the middle of town. Then played kickball ' til the sun went down. But now all I do is get VD. What the hell happened to me? It makes no sense. I can't believe I ended up me. I'm outta my gourd. Won't somebody please help me. I'm kind of a wierdo.