Schadenfreude - Natalie Venetia Belcon, Rick Lyon

Gary: Right now you are down and out And feelin' really crappy. Nikki: I'll say. Gary: And when I see how sad you are, It sorta makes me happy. Nikki: Happy? Gary: Sorry Nikki. Human nature- Nothing I can do. It's Schadenfreude Making me feel glad that I'm not you. Nikki: Now that's not very nice Gary. Gary: I didn't say it was nice, But everybody does it. 'Dya ever clap when a waitress falls And drops a tray of gla*ses? Nikki: Yea. Gary: And ain't it fun to watch figure skaters Fallin' on their a*ses? Nikki: Sure. Gary: Don't you feel all warm and cozy Watching people out in the rain? Nikki: You bet. Gary: That's Both: Schadenfreude. Gary: People taking pleasure in your pain. Nikki: Oh. Schadenfreude, huh? What's that? Some kind of Nazi word? Gary: Yup. It's German for 'happiness at the misfortune of others'. Nikki: 'Happiness at the misfortune of others' That is German! Watching a vegetarian Being told she just ate chicken. Gary: Or watching a frat boy Realize just what he put his d**k in. Nikki: Being on an elevator when somebody Shouts 'Hold the door!' Gary: Oh yea! Both: No! Schadenfreude… Gary: f**k you lady! That's what stairs are for! Nikki: Ooh- How about: Straight A student's getting B's… Gary: Exes getting STDs… Nikki: Waking doormen from their naps… Gary: Watching tourists reading maps… Nikki: Football players getting tackled… Gary: CEOs getting shackled… Nikki: Watching actors never reach… Both: The ending of their Oscar speech! Schadenfreude! Schadenfreude! Schadenfreude! Schadenfreude! Gary: The world needs people like you and me Who've been knocked around by fate 'Cause when people see us They don't want to be us And that makes them feel great Nikki: Sure. We provide a vital service to society. Both: You and me! Schadenfreude Making the world a better place Making the world a better place Making the world a better place to be! Gary: S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!